In lieu of a ‘regular’ blogpost, because my thoughts are scattered like the Neptune Society, today I give you my list of randomness, inspired in part by Erin (who gave us her own variety of random last week), and brought to you by two loaves of zucchini bread, two batches of zucchini brownies, one sad cup of decaf coffee and my lack of sleep.

 

So here goes:

1. In case you don’t follow me on twitter, or facebook, or know me in real life, let me just tell you I’m TIRED. Like dead corpse tired. Want to go back to bed before I get out of bed tired. Yeah, that kind of tired. TIRED. Just really epically tired.

2. Ella is teething. Bless her peapickin heart, she’s about the cutest thing there ever was, even if she does have horns on her head, razors for teeth and flames shooting from her nostrils. And is screaming. And trying to bite my nipples off. Teething is an asshole. Teething, You’re a PRICK.

3. Speaking of nipples (move on to #4 if you don’t want to hear about nipples), my boobs. Oh yes. Boobs. Mine. A. They are no longer fitting in my bra. Which is awesome because they weren’t NEARLY MOUNT EVEREST ENOUGH BEFORE. and B. Yeah, they hurt AND there is a baby attached to them like about 12 hours a day. Moms, remember that flaming, burning, aching DO NOT EVEN LOOK AT MY BREASTS UNLESS YOU WANT ME TO RIP YOUR EYES OUT feeling you get when you’re newly pregnant? Yeah. That. And I’m still nursing. And as a result of aforementioned teething, I’m nursing, oh just about 77 times a day. (it’s actually surprisingly not that bad. No, really. All that other stuff was for effect.)

4. Did I mention I was tired?

5. My husband has an extra long week away this week so that’s awesome because I don’t really like him AT ALL. And he’s never helpful at all. And I don’t like sleep or somebody to snuggle with. So yeah. AWESOME. (not)

6. My 13 year old SON is surprisingly helpful and really quite good with the baby. I mean like REALLY REALLY good. Like I’d pay him. He’s good. I didn’t give him enough credit. I feel bad about this. But grateful (because of numbers 1 and 4).

7. Because of #1 and #4, (I’m TIRED, in case you hadn’t heard) I have recently become quite the slave driving chore requiring mother. I’ve always had the children do certain things and at times we have had very organized chore charts with reward systems even (not now though because I’m too lazy to do that every week, I mean get real, people) but recently I’ve let go of the guilt of feeling like because I’m back home again (after working outside the home for several years) I should be doing ALL the household duties. No. SO it goes like this. I wake up at the Ass Crack of dawn and I go for my 2.5 – 3 mile-ish walk while the children (the big ones anyway) slumber peacefully in their beds. Then I come home and leisurely prepare Ella and I breakfast. Then I grab the TRUMPET and sound the GET THE EFF OUT OF BED alarm and they get up all smiles and joy and happiness. Or something like that. Little do they know, dun dun dun, while they slumbered peacefully I prepared a chore chart of EPIC PROPORTIONS with things like pick up dog poop (ALL OF IT) and clean your rooms (No. REALLY), and unload the dishwasher (YEAH, the silverware too), and fold the laundry (NO, not JUST YOURS, all of it), and vacuum (yeah, with the vacuum ON and yeah if you don’t do it right I’ll make you do it again. Don’t TEST ME.) Stuff like that. So far… working. Thank you little baby Jesus with the little baby Jesus halo in the tiny little manger. I need the help.

8. People say things like this to me all the time, “OH WELL at least you’re other kids are OLDER so they can help you. That must be nice. How lucky you are.” And I am. I’m lucky I have four awesome healthy children. But here’s the truth (mom’s of TEENS SPEAK UP), NOT REALLY. Teenagers are not like toddlers. Oh they are in this regard, they are MESSY and BOSSY and backtalk-y, they respond to the same positive reinforcement and spend the same amount of time ignoring you, but other than that no. They’re rooms are almost always a disaster (oh wait that’s like toddlers too). They can make their own food. AND leave the kitchen a huge mess. They have places to BE. Like all the time. It sounds like this, “MOM LEAVE ME ALONE. Uh but first, can you take me to the mall?” SO yeah, no. I’m not saying having 3 kids under 4 was EASY (it was, in reality a nightmare oft times) I’m just saying have 3 kids over 11 isn’t EASY either. Having fours kids is just not easy. Nope.  I’ll give you this, I can hand one of them Ella so I can shower but the fact is I’m only showering so I can take one of them to the store to get tampons/ deodorant/ swim trunks/ a birthday gift for a friend/ a poster board/ a binder or to school or to a friends house or or or. You get my point. Awesome, yes. Easy, no.

9. I am thankfully not nauseous (YET). There will be more on this in the weekly pregnancy update later in the week.  I am going to try to NOT make every.single.post about me being pregnant because I know that’s going to bore the holy hell out of about 25% of my readers (though feel free to tell me if I’m wrong) but it’s hard because, yeah, pregnant. So so pregnant.

10. I am wearing maternity pants. Not because Im’ showing (I’m just chubby) but because I hate pants. So there you go.

 

Until next time… love and kisses and cakes