about mommabare

Thanks for coming by the blog y’all. If you’ve gotten this far, I assume you want to know some stuffs about me. Here goes.

I’m Joni. I am named after Joni Mitchell, the Canadian folk singer. Because my parents were hippies. Kids used to call me Johnny. Consequently I hated my name.  To that end I wanted to change it to the most common name of the 80’s. Jennifer. Also I wanted small ears and blonde hair. Anyway. I’m over it now. My husband thinks my ears are adorable. People do still call me Johnny though.

I’m 40. Which means I was a kid of the 70’s, a teen of the 80’s, and as for the 90’s, well, they were a time of Birkenstocks and mostly bad hair. As a little girl I had a bike with a banana seat, a love of Barry Manilow and 7 stepdads.

Yes, seven.

I was born in a small town. (Not exactly true. Really I was born in Cincinnati, but we promptly up and left when I was 10 days old because my dad {who is never wrong} said “Only people who can’t get out of Ohio stay there.” [My apologies to you, People of Ohio] )

Joni Year One

That’s me. I like to call this one: “DOLL WHY AREN’T YOU TALKING TO ME?” And yes my ears are still that big.

I live in a small town.

(That part is true.)

I went to Europe and then I went away to college.

And then I came back.

Some people just never learn.

Eventually, I married the guy in the green shirt in the picture below. We met at the 6th grade district spelling bee. 1986. This picture was taken on the last day of 8th grade. I completely adored him. I’m not sure he felt the same, but for the sake of argument I’m going to say yes. He has his hand on my head. He is pretending to suck my brains out.

This explains why I can’t remember much about 8th grade.

In any case, it took a while but we finally got it together. He is my fairytale. Also he is a great kisser. You’ll just have to take me at my word on that last part.

We got married when we were 35.

I’d already been married and divorced once. I had 3 kids. He’d also been married and divorced. He had a cat. So he came back to the Small Town (from the Big City) and we moved the cat and the kids in together. It’s a really smashing good time.


Also we are obviously both good spellerz. Though I can beat him a scrabble (he wins every chess game however).

And speaking of getting married, I did. 8 months pregnant. In red.

Because I’m a rebel.

And speaking of kids, I’ve got 5 of them. Five.

Did I mention I have 5 kids?

They. Are. Fantastic.

I believe in Attached Parenting. Most of the time. This means breastfeeding, co-sleeping, babywearing and looking a little like a hippie. Sometimes I believe in Survival Parenting. Which means I’ll do whatever I need to do to survive. Including feed a child a rice krispie treat for breakfast.

Speaking of hippies, I had my last baby in the kitchen. Read why here.

In a pool.

It. Was. Awesome.

I am a little bit of a hippie. But I do still shave my legs (not my armpits though).

Love is my religion. Thank you. Next item of business.

I write. I knit. I crochet. I sew. I bake. But I don’t do any of them very often, mostly because, did I mention I have 5 kids?

I made this:

It took me a week.

That might sound impressive. But you should know, it’s four inches tall. So yeah. It probably would take anyone else an hour.

I believe in being honest. Sometimes brutally so. I’m willing to lay it all on the table for the sake of every other mom who thinks she’s the only mom who ever fed her kids McDonalds as a bribe. This is to you: You aren’t. Carry on.

Thanks for coming by. Stick around if you’re so inclined.Let’s get to know each other.